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THE NEW YORK TIMES
Jacqueline Schatz And David Martinez
March 30, 2003
Jacqueline Schatz, a psychotherapist, was married yesterday to David Martinez, a lawyer. The Rev. Paula Posman, an interfaith minister, officiated at Loft Eleven, a party space in Manhattan.
Ms. Schatz, 35, is keeping her name. She has a private practice in Manhattan and is a supervisor in the family and couples treatment division of the Institute for Contemporary Psychotherapy, also in Manhattan. She graduated from Barnard and from Columbia, from which she received a Master of Arts and a Master of Education degree, both in psychological counseling. She is a daughter of Dr. Howard Schatz, a retired ophthalmic surgeon living in Manhattan, and Susan Rabin, a lawyer in San Francisco.
Mr. Martinez, 31, specializes in entertainment law in Manhattan and also plays bass and sings in the William Diggins Band, a rock quartet. He graduated from the State University of New York at Binghamton and from Rutgers Law School. His mother is a teacher's aide at Public School 811 in Little Neck, Queens. His father is a radiology technician at St. John's Queens Hospital in Elmhurst.
Although he was raised in Queens by Spanish-speaking parents from Puerto Rico, Mr. Martinez had not learned to speak Spanish very well.
"My parents spoke Spanish to one another, but not to me," he said. But his lack of fluency in the language, especially given his surname, had always bothered him, he said.
To remedy that, he decided to take a three-month evening class at the Cervantes Institute in Manhattan. He recalled noticing Ms. Schatz among the dozen or so students on the first day of class, remembered being suddenly glad that his command of the language was not all it could be.
"I liked her fair skin, blue eyes and long, straight black hair," Mr. Martinez said.
He did not approach her until the class ended in March, because he had no indication that she was receptive to his advances. With the class ending, he decided that he had nothing to lose and asked for her e-mail address.
"Every comment he made in class was either negative, pessimistic or angry," Ms. Schatz remembered. "He was very funny, but I was not impressed. I didn't want that kind of negativity in my life."
In retrospect, Mr. Martinez said he understood how she could get that impression.
"As much as I am outgoing and personable, I know that I can come off rough around the edges," he said. "I was a typical Gen X'er whose first experience with the real world came after college. I was young enough to wonder why things weren't better."
Coincidentally, they both signed up for another Spanish class the following session.
"I thought great, I have another shot," he said. "But on the outside, I did not want her to think I was still interested in her."
Their relationship came to a boil one evening after class, when she mentioned to him that she hates being called Jackie.
"I said, `I'm going to call you Jackie, because . . . ' "
She finished his sentence: "Because you are hostile toward me."
Mr. Martinez, impressed that she had stuck up for herself, responded, "I do like you."
Reflecting on the moment, Mr. Martinez said: "Nothing I was doing worked. I figured now the ball is in her court."
The confrontation forced Ms. Schatz to reconsider. "He was acting as if rejection hadn't mattered to him, and when I finally called his bluff, that is when he actually showed me his heart," she said. "What won me over was his humanity, not his good looks and charm, which are considerable."
They went their separate ways that night, Mr. Martinez not knowing whether his moment of vulnerability would bring ridicule or affection.
"We got along better in class after that conversation," he said. "One night, a couple of weeks later, I asked if she was free for dinner. She said yes."